The impact of a child’s crime extends far beyond the perpetrator, deeply affecting their families and communities. Parents grapple with feelings of guilt, shame, and isolation as they navigate the complex legal and emotional repercussions of their children’s actions.

Three families share their experiences:

One couple, Frans and Ineke van Es, faced a harrowing ordeal when their son, Max, committed a violent home robbery to fuel his drug addiction. Max’s struggles began in his youth, marked by a descent into drug abuse and petty crimes, culminating in a violent home invasion that landed him in prison. The couple recounts the devastating impact on their family, including feelings of powerlessness, social stigma, and the constant fear of further transgressions.

Femke de Poorter’s son, Joep, was arrested in Germany with 33 kilos of cocaine in his car. Joep, a hardworking shoemaker, faced financial ruin during the pandemic, leading him to accept a risky job that ultimately resulted in his imprisonment. The arrest and subsequent death of Femke’s husband led to family division. Despite the family struggle, Femke remains supportive, focusing on his rehabilitation and future.

Dave Hovenga’s son, Roy, committed a fatal stabbing at the age of 17. The crime shattered their lives, leading to social ostracism, threats, and the necessity to relocate. Dave founded Stichting Sang, an organization that offers support and advocacy for families of detainees, seeking to provide a listening ear and raise awareness of their unique challenges.

These families’ stories highlight the profound and lasting consequences of a child’s crime on their loved ones. While the perpetrators face legal consequences, their families often endure a silent suffering, grappling with guilt, shame, and the struggle to rebuild their lives.