Loes Bouman, a 100-year-old woman, reflects on her life, marked by solitude, resilience, and independence. In a recent interview, she shares her experiences, offering insights into her upbringing, marriage, widowhood, and unique perspective on life.
Bouman recalls a childhood where she was discouraged from bringing friends home, fostering a sense of self-reliance that she still values today. “I am good at being alone,” she states, acknowledging the advantages she finds in her solitary nature.
Growing up in Ammerzoden, Bouman remembers her mother as the dominant figure in the household, making all the decisions. This unconventional dynamic shaped her view of gender roles and the submissive nature often expected of women in her generation. She recalls her mother buying a car without consulting her father, a move that caused tension but was ultimately accepted to maintain harmony.
Bouman’s childhood was further marked by a somber atmosphere and a lack of affection between her parents. To escape the tension, she immersed herself in books, finding solace in stories like Robinson Crusoe and Alone in the World.
A turning point in Bouman’s life was the arrival of the village midwife, Doetje Bij de Leij. Doetje’s independent and cheerful nature provided Bouman with a positive role model and a sense of liberation. “She opened my world,” Bouman says, emphasizing the importance of Doetje’s influence during her formative years.
In 1945, Bouman married Piet Bouman and moved to Scheveningen. Sadly, their marriage was cut short when Piet passed away at the young age of 36, leaving Bouman a widow with three small children. Despite the challenges, she remained resilient, raising her children with a focus on equality and openness.
Bouman reflects on the difficulty of making decisions alone as a young widow but prioritized giving her children freedom and trusting their judgment. She never remarried, choosing instead to focus on her family and career. She returned to work at the PTT and found joy in solo camping trips.
Throughout her life, Bouman has embraced simplicity and resisted societal pressures. She never owned a television or computer, preferring to engage with the world in her own way.
When asked about an important life lesson, Bouman emphasizes the importance of letting go of negativity. “That you have to leave nasty things behind you,” she advises, adding that worrying is unproductive.
Despite her extraordinary life, Bouman remains humble, believing that her experiences are ordinary. However, her story offers a unique glimpse into the past and a testament to the power of resilience, independence, and finding contentment in solitude.